Thanksgiving; one day out of the year that SHOULD be everyday

So tomorrow is Thanksgiving. The one day out of the year that we all come together and give thanks that we are living in a free country, and are all so fortunate and whatnot. Things like that. But why should we only be thankful only this week? The thing is that we shouldn’t. We need to be thankful towards God every single day of our life. Because think about what he gave us. He sent his one and only son into this horrible world to live, be tortured and humiliated and then die for all of our sins, so that we could be forgiven and one day, if we accept his gift, go and be with him. I mean that’s pretty cool right? I mean, I’m thankful for that!! I thank him as much as I can, because that’s something that I believe that we should do. But I don’t thank him only for this. I thank him for everything that I have. Because there are a lot of people out there who aren’t nearly as fortunate as I am. And I complain about my parents not being able to afford new school clothes, when I can barley clothes all 7 drawers full of clothes that I have, because they are so full of clothes, most I never even wear. Where do we learn to act like this? It’s because we live in a world where we are all so spoiled that we take everything for granted. And we shouldn’t. The other day I was watching the today show like I do every morning and they were doing a segment that was something about people helping out the less fortunate this Thanksgiving. And I just remember thinking to myself “I wish people didn’t have to help others like this. I wish that everyone could be just as fortunate as everyone else. That there would be no more starving children or teenage girls being bought and sold as sex slaves. There wouldn’t be any more homeless people, or people without jobs that need them, or even schools without paper and the regular school supplies needed for everyday teaching.” But this is an ideal world. And that kind of world is never going to exist, no matter how many times I wish it, or ask God for it. So what I want to say it this; when you’re out shopping at all of those Christmas sales at the crack of dawn on Friday for presents, and you’re sad because you can’t afford the coolest sweater, or new iPod, remember all the kids and people who don’t even have a place to go this Christmas. Or the people who are hoping that the one thing that they will get is a toothbrush and some toothpaste, and when you walk by the Salvation Army man at the door to this mall that you are shopping in, put in double that you were going to put in. there are people out there that need it more than you. And while you’re doing it, thank God for everything that he has given you, and apologize for any greedy thought that you have ever had, because God will always provide for you if you trust in him.

Deception; a common way to find your true friend

So lately I’ve learned that people can be quite deceptive. They will be your best friend one minute, and spreading rumors about you the next. They say they will always have your back, but is that really true? What is a true friend? I have to say that in my 17 years of living, I thought that I have had a lot of “true friends” and now I am coming to the terms of I really haven’t. But somehow I am okay with that. And I think that was the biggest surprise to me, that I am okay with the fact that I have never had a true friend.

I remember once having a conversation with a particular person and them telling me “I have never really had a true friend.” And I think that was when I really starting thinking that ‘Wow, I never really have either’. Well, except for this person that is. I think that they really are my only true friend. But what is a true friend? Is a true friend one that you can hang out with and make you laugh? While that sounds all fun and games, what happens when you are doing something that you shouldn’t do? Is that “true friend” going to care enough to tell you that you shouldn’t be doing that? Or that maybe you are making an mistake on something that you are really determined that is what you are supposed to do? Probably not. I have come to the conclusion that I think we really only have two true friends in our lifetime. One, being Jesus. He is always going to be there, he always has your back. He would never say anything bad about you, and he will tell you when you are doing something wrong. On top of it, he died for you. How many friends do you have that would stand up and take pure humiliation and torture and die for you? Probably, more often than not, none. But I believe that the second true friend is and should be your spouse. And for many people this is not the case. And I feel sorry for them. Watching my parents interact with each other for the last 14 years, I can honestly say that they are each other’s best friend. Of course there are times where they fight, everyone has times where they fight. But when they are not, they are the best of friends. And obvisouly I'm not saying that everybody should now go out and base their marriage on my parents, but just hear me out.

My mom’s job sucks, and if you know her, you know that. And there are times where she will come home crying, and my dad will just say “Hey, don’t let it bother you. She (being my mom’s boss) is a pig, and she is just jealous of you”. And she really just needs someone to say that to her. A true friend will do anything to make you happy. They will submit to your needs, and put you first. Always. They will help you grow in many ways immensely, and you will also do the same for them. They will teach you things you never thought you needed to know, they will help you see things you never saw before. But isn’t this what the Bible tells us our spouses will be like? See the connection here? So sit down right now, and list off every friend that you have ever had. How many of them could you call a true friend, from those standards? For some, maybe you already have your true friend. Hold on to that person. You never know what could become of them. They are going to continue to help you grow, and learn, and see things differently. They will always have your back no matter what. They will support you, and love you, and they don’t care if you have a cool car, or the latest video game. Because they are a TRUE friend.

LIFE; basically a game of dominoes

I’m writing another post today because I have this urge that I have to. I love to write. And sometimes I just get these urges to write and write and write, and not stop. And I never have really figure out why. I think it is because I am a very curious (some people would call it nosey) person, and I am always thinking. But for me, thinking includes writing stuff down, and whether other people see it or not is entirely up to me. But I was reading my two posts that I have written in the past two days. And I noticed something; they are two dramatically different things. The topics, the way I viewed things, everything. Once was just very dark and talking about how the world is never going to change, and there is always going to be hurt and nothing can stop that, but the other was about love and how we all need to experience this, and how it’s wonderful and amazing. And it just made me think (of course). Why can/does the human brain see things differentially? Why can I go from one minute thinking about how the world is cold and hard and hurtful, to just gushing about love and all its beauty the next? How does that make sense really? I don’t think I will fully understand. And somehow I just know that if I knew why the brain would do this, it would ruin half of the inspiration. I wouldn’t have much to think about anymore if I knew everything that the human brain did, and why. And what fun would that be? Where would the excitement be? The adventure? The challenge? Well today after I posted my first post of the day I took a shower. And while I was in the shower I was thinking to myself this; “How can people go from talking about one topic, and end up at a completely different one, and then still somehow, they connect?” This is what I feel happens with a lot of my writing, a lot of things in my life, a lot of things that happen in the world. Think about a long phone conversation. You couldn’t sit and talk about your favorite pair of shoes for two hours with the person, but I’m sure that you can find things that connect to the shoes, and then the color, and how that color is like the color of your walls in your room, and how you want to re-do your room…and look!! Now you’re talking about what color your bedspreads are and what not? Like how does this happen? But I’m sure if you went back, you could trace the entire conversation back to your favorite pair of shoes. Everything is a dominoes affect. Everything in life. Thinking about one thing, makes you want to think of another to make that first thought make sense. I was fist thinking about hurt and how much I have had in my life, though in turn it makes me think about all of the things that I love in life…see how that just connected? Dominoes.

Love; just another lesson on how to be yourself.

What is love? Well according to the song love is this;

L-the way you look at me
O-the only one I see
V- very very extraordinary
E- even more than anyone you adore

But to me this doesn’t seem to make sense to me. Because, yes, this could be love, but love isn’t always like this. It isn’t always, fluff and duff and happy. I mean seriously. How many people can say that they feel this way about their PARENTS? I mean I defiantly cannot. Usually the way my parents look at me is the “I need her to do something” or “turn down your music” look. That’s not a look I want to see from the “one”. J. Lookadoo said “Love doesn’t feel all mushy. Love isn’t sweaty palms and sleepless nights. Love is a decision you make to care for someone no matter how you feel. If they are disfigured in an accident or throwing up for hours on end, you will still love them.” I feel like this sums love up completely. Love isn’t something you “find”. Love is not a feeling. Love is something that you have to experience for yourself. But it’s not a feeling towards someone or something. It’s the “decision” that you make to never change about how you feel about it. No matter what happens. Whether they do something to upset you, or to hurt you, it still isn’t going to change how you feel. It is different for everyone, and everything. You can love your car, your pet, your significant other, your sister, your house.

There are a lot of different things that you can love, but everyone loves everyone and everything differently. When I first started dating my boyfriend everyone told me that we were going too fast, and that we should slow things down, and start out as friends. What I said to them was this “the way you think I should love, and they way I actually do, are two totally different things. You have to let me fail in order for me to understand how I truly want to love”. So far I haven’t failed. Because starting out as friends wasn’t how it was supposed to be. I have tried that, and failed, and now I know that, that is not that way that I love people. I like to jump right into things and see where they take me, and I am not afraid to get hurt. And isn’t that what love is all about? Trying new things, and having new experiences. Not being afraid to get your hands dirty, and whatever happens, happens, and because you are so in over your head, that you don’t see it. Everything is just “magical” so to speak. Don’t we all want that? I guess the bottom line here of what I am trying to say is, this; love is not something that you can duplicate. It is not “The Notebook” or “Pride and Prejudice”, it is something that you have to make up on your own. You are never going to have a fairytale “love”. Those kinds of movies and stories and ways of thinking are what I like to call “women porn”. It makes you think that this if this happens, you are going to be complete. But it never will complete you, you will always be left wanting more. Love is just another lesson on how to be yourself, and not have what other people do, or do not have.

Hurt; why is it so addicting?

I have found recently that the emotion that I see the most is HURT. There are a lot of hurting people out there. I see it everyday with my friends. Someone said this, someone did this. This happened with so-and-so, those two are fighting. She misses him so much it hurts, he could just say one little thing and hurt her. Why is it that even just the littlest things hurt us the most? Take relationships. If you’re in high school, I’m sure that you hear about at least 10 or more break ups a month. Plus relationships that become. But every time two people get together, or two people break up, someone is always hurt no matter what. Whether they broke up because they were both mad or not, someone is always going to get hurt, like it or not. Sometimes the person getting hurt isn’t even a person directly affected by what is going on. If you just get a little to involved with other people’s business, *poof* there’s your recipe to get yourself hurt. I find myself in this situation more often than I would like. The profession I would like to pursue is psychology. So, naturally, I like to listen to other peoples problems. But the thing that I always end up doing is getting too into the problem itself, getting myself way too involved in the situation, when it has nothing to do with me whatsoever. And when the outcome of the problem occurs, I get myself hurt, even though it has nothing to do with me. So the question I have to ask myself is why? Why do we, myself included, always keep doing the things that we know are going to hurt us the most? How does this make sense? We see it happen in situations before, so why do we always go back to it? Why do we like the pain so much? It’s not like cutting where the physical pain makes you not think about the emotional pain, you’re causing the emotional pain. So why do we do this? Why do we like to make ourselves hurt? I don’t think that I will ever understand this as long as I live. Because right now I am still involved in too many things that have nothing to do with me. I think that I can make them better, but I can’t, they just hurt me. If we all just learned to stay out of each others business, then maybe we wouldn’t be hurting so much. If we only have to worry about us, and us only, doesn’t that make our lives so much easier? But, naturally, humans are curious creatures, so that will never happen. Therefore, there will always be hurting people. And breakups, and fighting, and affairs, and everything. The world won’t change.

We are a hurting people.
That is not going to change, it is our fault.
It’s time to face the facts.